Stormy Morning

Seems like every couple of years we get a storm that knocks out our power for an extended period of time. We've been in this house for 6 1/2 years, and this is the third one. Well, the power went out while I was working on a nice, long post at FHL Forums. And, I'd just gotten my desktop hooked up so I was using it. That means, when the power went out, I lost my post.


Well, the power went out at about 6:00 this morning. I'm listening to the radio (KSBJ - you can get it where you are via the 'net!), and we're on the edge of the tornado warning. Now we've got a candle going, and I'm working on my laptop. When it's not connected to the network (which is down right now due to lack of power! :) ), I get a couple hours of battery life. Not too bad.
Well, I'm rambling right now. (Is that appropriate?)
My girls got up - the thunder and lightning scared them. I lit a candle and I've got nice God music playing on the radio. I pulled out the sofa bed and they're snuggled up on it. My little one is terrified. Big sister is holding her. We are incommunicado 'cuz I let my cell phone lapse, and without power our VOIP is down. I need to get a backup power system. My wife got to work before the storm started. There was a lot of lightning when she left.
We're very close to the Fort Bend/Harris County line (on the Harris County side) and Fort Bend County is under a tornado warning until 6:35am. It's 6:30 right now. A severe thunderstorm warning for Harris (and surrounding) County until 7:00 am. I'm completely in the dark - no lights inside or out. But Fort Bend County is large, and, though I don't know where the tornadic storm is, I can be about 95% sure it's not near our neck of the woods.
Of course, this won't be posted until the lights come back on. What's frustrating is that I got up early (5:00) to work on my web page. All my stuff is stored on a server which is down right now.

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Well, apparently, God has bigger things in store for me today than working on my webpage. I've got the windows open and the radio on. I'm keeping my kids calm. I'm watching God's light show and listening to His drum solo. If anyone knows how to play the drums, it's Him!
6:40 - there's still a lot of thunder and lightning, but the rain's let up. I think the storm has passed to the east. When the power comes up, I'll download a radar loop and post it along with this. There are about 20 counties under a severe thunderstorm warning, and Chuck Swindoll just came on the radio. He's always a calming influence. The kids like the radio, it's keeping them calm.
I'll post more later.
Well, 7:17 now. The lights came back on. I'm getting breakfast ready for the kids. I'll find the radar loop and download it.

Fun morning! Adios!

The Perils and Pitfalls of being a Stay-At-Homeschool Parent

Well, my doctor said it wasn't the wasp sting that made me sick. No, it's the flu. Just good timing.

So, now I feel horrible, and I'm still responsible for my 24x7 job. My wife can't take off from work, and I know she can't, so I have to take my daughter to homeschool PE. I have to prepare lunch. I still have to do lessons. And I feel horrible. I just want to lay in bed.

When I had a job, if I had the flu, I'd stay in bed until I got better. Now that I don't have a real job, I have to work. I wish there was a better way.

Homeschooling is great. She's in first grade (technically) and reading at a 4th grade level, doing 3rd grade math. She's not exposed to the anti-Christianity you get in public schools. She's not exposed to the blatant sex and drugs that are available in elementary school.

But days like today make me wonder. True, I've still got a two-year-old to deal with, even if the older one was in school, but that would only be half the kids to care for.

Ah, well. I guess that no matter what we choose, there will be problems associated with it. Today I want to make my kids take a nap all day. That way I can, too.

nothing special

I was gonna write something profound today, but yesterday I got stung by a wasp and I think I'm mildly allergic. I really don't feel good today. So I'm not going to write anything today except for this complaing. Check back often - you never know when something really profound will come from this keyboard!

Getting things set up

I'm setting up a website that I call "A Clearinghouse for All Things Clay". It's gonna have stuff about homeschooling, Christian Unity, programs I've written, etc. I'm also going to have a place on there from where I can sell stuff. Homeschooling is expensive, and I need to raise money. So, I'm gonna try to sell stuff. As soon as I get a domain name, I'll be online.

More later!

Learning experiences

A brief note 'cuz there needs to be a couple of updates...

On February 13, 2006, I posted a comment about the sewage that spewed up into my house. I was very happy for my neighbor who has been fighting ever since (2 months tomorrow) to get this resolved. I am still without carpet in the affected areas. But I continue to thank God for my good neighbor who's keeping an eye out for us.
Rather than post names and phone numbers of everyone's who's dropped the ball on us, I ask that you pray for those who have tried to hold out on us. Pray that they may see the error of their ways. Pray that they may change their hearts. Also, pray that I maintain an even keel through this whole thing.
Lesson Learned: Always know who your friends are!

My oldest learned how to ride her bike on Tuesday. This was a major success. She'd been so afraid to ride it that she grew out of two bikes before successfully riding one. Sunday afternoon, she came in excited about riding her bike. Mommy was going to help her. A few minutes later, she was crying that Mommy wouldn't let her skate. I said, "I thought you were going to ride your bike." She said, "I want to skate. Mommy wants me to ride my bike."
I went and asked Mommy - the same Mommy that will not tolerate quitters. She said, "She got scared to ride her bike and wanted to skate instead."
So, I went back in and began what I call my "Baptist Sermon" about riding the bike. My daughter's favorite Bible verse is "I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength." I started hitting that one hard. If I'd had a pulpit, I would've been hitting it. I told her that she knows that verse in her head - now she needs to drive it home in her heart! There will be no skating until you can ride your bike to the end of the street! And your goal is Friday. "So let it be written, so let it be done!" That was Sunday.
Monday, she was out there trying to ride her bike. Though I told her she was going to get 30 minutes, she worked for 90 minutes. She was doing pretty good, but still needed help. Tuesday, she went AROUND THE BLOCK!!!! Woohoo! Three days before her goal of riding to the end of the street, she went around the block with Mommy! I was so proud of my girl! Now she can choose - skate or bike.
Lesson Learned: Determination will get you through anything.

Wednesday, we made a cake. I gave Nichole two measuring cups (1 cup, 1/4 cup) and asked her to fill them up and put them in the microwave for 30 seconds. Well, we didn't quite understand the concept of seconds and minutes. She set the microwave for 30:00 and hit start. I was getting stuff ready and looked around for my water. I looked at the microwave and my jaw dropped when I saw that there were 26:37 remaining in my 30 seconds. It had cooked for 3:23!
I opened up the door and pulled out the plastic cups of boiling water. One had a spot in it. When I picked it up, all the water ran out through the spot - which was a hole in the bottom of the cup. We embarked on a lesson which my daughter will never forget about seconds, minutes and hours.
Lesson Learned: Don't think your kids know everything like you think they do... Ya think?

Sin - What's YOUR Favorite?

I was born in a place called "Sin City" - Las Vegas, Nevada. It was ALL there. Billboards with scantily-clad women. Gambling. Streetwalkers. Crime syndicates. What's your pleasure? Come to Vegas and indulge!

There are resorts in Jamaica called "Hedonism". According to one web definition, it is the belief that pleasure is the greatest good and highest aspiration of mankind. In early utilitarian thinking, this belief provided the interpretation of 'utility' or 'good'. An online travel review of the resort says, At the resorts Hedonism II and III the term pleasure is synonymous with, SEX! So Webster would define the resorts as "a way of life devoted to sex."

But, aside from sex, there are other sins. Lying, gluttony, pride, theft - all self-indulgent sins. Why are they fun? Why will Christians go to great lengths to justify these sins for themselves or others?

I have been watching, with great interest, a discussion on the Bible's stance on homosexuality. I have two concerns with this:

• Why just homosexuality? There are a great deal of sinful lifestyles that the church does not address, including corporate greed (hey, as long as they give us some $, we don't care), bigotry (race, appearance, financial status, etc.), pride (we're the only ones going to Heaven!)...


• Why would any Christian want to condone any sinful lifestyle?

I define a sinful lifestyle as any lifestyle an unrepentant sinner undertakes. One is unrepentant if they acknowledge their sin and choose to continue in it, or if they refuse to acknowledge it as sin (denial).

Let's look at pride. In all reality, this is the worst of the sins. Pride is what caused Lucifer's fall. Pride led many kings to be declared gods. Pride has led to many, many splits in Christ's Church. Does anyone honestly want to approach this issue? Why not? Because it might hit home. For anyone to preach against pride, one must preach against themselves. Only after one has been humbled by defeat in their personal plans can one preach against pride. And, if the sermon is a success, people will be heaping praise upon the speaker -- which leads to pride.

Or, perhaps after you deliver your sermon, someone in your church gets offended - someone with a lot of money - and they leave the church with their money, never to return. Truth be told, you would probably be better off without their negative influence (1 Corinthians 5). But can the church survive without their financial support? So, the preacher decides not to preach that sermon out of fear of stepping on toes.

That's really what it boils down to - stepping on toes. Let's preach on sin, but not any sin that might be happening in our institution. Let's not say anything that's politically incorrect.

What is sin, after all? It's so watered down. Some people say that since Jesus said nothing about a certain issue it cannot be a sin. After all, the New Testament overrides the Old Testament, right? Wrong. Jesus said, "Do not think that I have come to abolish the Law or the Prophets; I have not come to abolish them but to fulfill them. I tell you the truth, until heaven and earth disappear, not the smallest letter, not the least stroke of a pen, will by any means disappear from the Law until everything is accomplished."

Matthew 5:17-18, NIV

The Old Testament defines sin as anything that separates us from God. Our pride causes us to not admit that our pleasure is sin. We then become separated from God without knowing it. Satan provides a convincing illusion that we are in tune with God and His desires, when in reality we are far from Him. For 36 years, I believed I was walking with God. I claimed to be a Christian while I spent my time getting drunk in topless bars. I sang in the choir with a hangover. I believed I was walking with God, but I was walking with His enemy. And I honestly believed that "Drunkenness is not a sin - it's what you do when you're drunk that's a sin. Looking at naked women isn't a sin - it's actually doing something with them that's a sin." Not to mention, I did the things when I was drunk, and I did more than look.

Can anyone honestly tell me that any sin is acceptable to God? Can you read the Bible objectively and tell me that some of the things listed above are not sins?

What's YOUR favorite sin? Are you willing to give it up?

Raising a Child

Are you a parent? How do you correct your children? Do you lead by example? Do you use time-outs? Do you find that on a rare occasion a firmer discipline is necessary?

How about as the children grow up? Does the discipline change over time? Do teens respond to time-outs the same way a six-year-old does? How about adult descendants living in your house (ie: 20 year old college student living at home)?

Like it or not, your precious child will have to be disciplined at some point in time. I've seen kids that are not disciplined, and I'm usually embarassed for the parents. Human beings are, by nature, rebellious. That means we don't want to follow orders - particularly when we think we have a better idea. So, we rebel. My kids are good at that. Even my two-year-old. They must be disciplined. And, they respond differently to different disciplines.

Occasionally, a kid must be spanked. Just a little something to let them know they crossed the line. As they grow older, however, and begin to learn about life, there are other methods that get their attention. Time-out, grounding, removal of priveleges - these are a few of the punishments kids experience as they grow up. When they are adults, the rule is, "If you want to live in my house, you'll follow my rules. You don't like my rules, you find another place to live."

The Bible calls this rebellion a sin nature (Romans 8). When we sin, we are rebelling against God. Sin requires discipline. How, then does God discipline? Why is there the Old Testament punishment (whacking an entire civilization) and New Testament punishment (grace under the Blood of Christ)?

Mankind was born when Adam and Eve were created. Mankind entered toddler years when they chose Satan over God. Mankind needed to be smacked. No longer immortal, they discovered what Paradise really was. They were no longer welcome there. God still took care of them, but He let them experience the fallen world in which we live. Mosquitoes, famine, cold, death.

Mankind began growing up in the fallen world. Always trying new things, by the time Noah was around it was time for discipline. Mankind needed a spanking. God disciplined the world for the sin that was being committed. After Noah, mankind continued to grow. God began to make deals with people like Noah, Abraham and Jacob. They are called 'covenants' in the Bible. These deals said, "Treat me right. Treat me like I'm the Only God ('cuz I am) and I will bless you." There were mistakes - and these mistakes were disciplined in painful ways (read about Ishmael and Dinah).

Still, though God loved His children. God wanted to steer us in the right way. He laid down the Law with Moses. "Live by these rules, and you will be blessed." There were a bunch of people who had not followed God's covenants and they had to be smacked. These people lived in Sodom and Gomorrah. They were the Edomites, the Moabites, the Ammonites and the Canaanites. They had begun to worship other gods. They had begun sacrificing their children to Molech. This was a practice that God said was 'detestable'. They worshipped fertility gods by having temple prostitutes whose job it was to perform lewd acts. This practice was also detestable. The people needed to be spanked.

With Moses, God's reactions to the Israelites began to change. Yeah, some people were smacked, but now they began to feel 'time-outs' when they disobeyed. Oppression by invaders (throughout the book of Judges) and famine were some methods. And mankind continued to grow. God began to warn people against their wicked ways through prophets. He began to let them know that they won't necessarily be smacked unless they absolutely need it. At one point, he grounded the entire population of Judah for 70 years. We call it 'The Exile'.

Finally, mankind grew into adult children. We're the 18-20 year olds living under Mom & Dad's roof. God sent His Son to tell us "If you want to stay in My house, you gotta follow my rules." And the rules were pretty simple. Believe Jesus died for your sins. Accept that. Accept the indwelling Holy Spirit. And listen to Him. Strive to live a life like Jesus would have. Those are the rules. You don't have to be perfect, as mistakes will be made, but you're welcome to stay in His house.

There will come a day when God will punish mankind once again. It is written in Revelation. And at that time, He's either gonna kick you out of His house, or He's gonna let you stay. I think you'll want to stay. That lake of fire doesn't sound like a good beach spot...

New Blog

I started a blog in partnership with a friend of mine. It's pretty new, so there aren't very many posts. But if you'd like to check it out, it's called The Rat and the Rambler. The Rat is my friend Gutter Rat from The Gutter Rat Chronicles. 'Course, I'm the Rambler.

We are from very different backgrounds. I know only very structured, traditional worship. He enjoys a bit more modern style on Sunday morning. I like a capella (vocal only - no instrument) music. He likes heavy metal. I have a checkered past that includes alcohol and a little pot. He's never touched the stuff. I think tattoos are disgusting. He has Christian tattoos.

Somehow, though, we agree on much of what we believe about Christ. As such, we want to demonstrate Unity in the Body of Christ. If you would, please visit our shared blog. Let us know what you think. And, by all means, please comment. It gives others a feeling they're not the only ones reading! :)

I'll still be posting here. There are some of my thoughts that work better here. So, I'll be doubling my efforts.

See you there! And here!

Adios,

Clay

Positive Thinking

I have heard all my life about having a Positive Mental Attitude. For forty years, my father drove this into my thick skull. I believed it, I really tried to practice it. But every day life kept getting me down. Maybe there's something to it, but I could never find it. The harder I tried to focus on the positive, the harder the negative would pound me. It got extremely painful to think positively. I mean, when you beat your head against the wall, you're gonna knock yourself out and get a little bloody in the process. So, from the time I was about 8 until I was 21, I tried to focus on the positive.

Since I met her, my wife has been telling me the same thing. There is an old song, "I want a girl just like the girl that married dear old dad". My song would be slightly different: "I got a girl just like the guy that married dear old mom". Not that she's masculine - she's very feminine (and HOT!). She's more woman than most of the women I know. But her mind works just like my dad's. She's focused, determined and successful. She's got her act together. She knows what she wants and she gets it.

Tonight we were having a discussion about homeschooling. I'm having serious trouble with it. I really didn't want it. I took it because it would mean her career would stabilize. I can't get a job to replace her pay, so I'm the Stay-At-Homeschool-Dad. Her job is one that I would love to have - dealing with computer security and scripting. Wow!

We discussed how to succeed - you picture in your head a successful outcome. Then, when all is said and done, you have succeeded. Simple, right? So I picture in my head a successful homeschooling. And the toilets back up and I'm stuck spending a lot of time trying to get the house ready for new carpet. Then I focus on schooling again. And I get sick. Then I focus and something else happens. How the heck do you stay focused on something when you keep getting whacked in the head?

Pray. Prayer is our hotline to God. He may not instantly change things to your liking, but He can give you peace to handle it. Ask Him for wisdom in situations that have you flustered. It works. Then you begin to ask His hand to guide you through His will to your goals. As long as your goals don't conflict with His will, you are guaranteed success. I see it in other aspects of my life. Why not here?

I have a mental block about this. I don't want to be here. Though I've been doing this for a while, I'm sitll hoping against hope that it will be a temporary situation. I'm still hoping that soon I'll be working again and my wife can come home and take care of the kids and the house. What's a man's position in the world, after all? Aren't we supposed to be bringing home the bacon? The male-oriented world has twisted my perception of the family into something it doesn't really have to be.

So, I need to pray hard for success in someplace that I really don't want to be. That's my problem. The success won't come without His intervention anyway; I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength. The converse is also true, I can do no things without Christ to give me strength. I want my kids to succeed in their education. I want my kids to learn at home 'cuz there's a lot of bad stuff in school, public and private. I want my kids to grow up in a Christian environment with little influence to abandon their Christian upbringing. That means, as long as I'm home, I need to be the one to ensure this happens.

I pray that God will show me how to be His servant even in the face of seemingly insurmountable odds. He has promised that He will give us no problems we can't overcome. So, I can overcome this - with His help. I need to change my attitude (as my wife always tells me) and believe that this is where I need to be. I need to focus on the now, and not worry about where I want to be. If I am faithful with a little bit, I will be rewarded with a lot.

I Am

That is the name God gave Moses when he asked who sent him. I'm sure Moses thought, "That's a strange name." But then again, he was talking with the One True God. So, maybe he didn't think a whole lot except, "Wow. I'm talking to God!"

Well, I've already rambled away from my intended topic. And I haven't even started. So here we go:

Why did God choose a phrase like "I Am" for His name? Why not "Bob" or "George" or "Almighty Master of All That There Is"?

I believe it has something to do with the immediacy of the phrase "I Am". It indicates now. Where did God come from? What is eternity? I've heard it said (and I think it was Irwin Lutzer that said it) about eternity:

Imagine a ship from outer space comes every million years and takes a single grain of sand from the Earth. It picks up one grain of sand and flies away for a million years. Then it returns and takes another single grain of sand. A million years later it returns for another single grain of sand. How many millions of years before there is enough sand to fill your hand? How many millions of years before there is nothing left here? And over that period of time, eternity will have hardly begun.

I read once that scientists estimate there are 10¹⁷ grains of sand. That is a 10 with 17 zeroes. Multiply that by a million (for a million years between each grain of sand) and you have a 10 with 23 zeroes. 100,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 years - and eternity has only just barely begun.

Well, if that's hard to get your mind around, perhaps this will make it easier. Time is a constraint. We are unable to move forward or backward in time because time itself prevents us from doing so. For God, however, that constraint is apparently not there. Prophets prove to us that God knows the future. He can also stop time (read Joshua 10) and run it backward (read Isaiah 38). So, He is in complete control of time.

My daughter was in a play where they said, "God holds time in the palm of His hand." That line helped me get my earthly scientific mind around this unfathomable concept. That implies that God created time. He is the Master of all He created. He created time. He is the Master of time. Therefore time has no meaning for God. Time is not a constraint for God. Time is not able hold Him back. Nor can it allow Him to change.

Without time, there is no future and no past. WIthout those, there can be no present - though some may argue that it is always the present, even without time. This author believes that it's a moot point. Without a future or past, there is no medium for change. God never changes. He doesn't have to - it's all the same.

I've heard people say that there are parallel universes through which one can pass - through which we all pass as time marches on. We can only go one direction. Kinda like Stephen King's Langoliers. I've also heard it said that time is a wheel or a circle that keeps repeating itself - and sometimes people or things get left in the wrong cycle. I think my idea is more plausible.

For God there is no time. That makes eternity possible. For God there is no time. He always was because there was never a beginning or past, and there will never be a future or end. That answers my question about "Where did God come from?" Remove the constraint of time and it all falls into place.

A deep philosophical rambling from the mind of Clay Harryman. I hope it hasn't hurt anyone!

Promises

Above all, my brothers, do not swear—not by heaven or by earth or by anything else. Let your "Yes" be yes, and your "No," no, or you will be condemned.James 5:12, NIV

"Again, you have heard that it was said to the people long ago, 'Do not break your oath, but keep the oaths you have made to the Lord.' But I tell you, Do not swear at all: either by heaven, for it is God's throne; or by the earth, for it is his footstool; or by Jerusalem, for it is the city of the Great King. And do not swear by your head, for you cannot make even one hair white or black. Simply let your 'Yes' be 'Yes,' and your 'No,' 'No'; anything beyond this comes from the evil one.

Matthew 5:33-37, NIV

"I promise I'll be back to check on you this week," I told my friend.

He'd recently been released from the hospital and was recovering at home. (The financial people at insurance companies force hospitals to release people too early in my esteemed opinion, but that's fodder for another blog!) He had called to ask if I could pick up some juice for him, and I obliged. When I got to his house, his fridge was empty - just a couple pieces of lunchmeat and some rancid Miracle Whip.

I told him to expect me back later that afternoon. Well, it was much later than expected - about 9:00 pm - when I arrived with groceries to put away for him. I made sure it was nutritious stuff, and also made sure that he could prepare it easily. On my way out the door, I made the promise I stated above.

I called a mutual friend and asked him to drop in and check on him periodically, he said he would. We sorta arranged to split it with him on MWF and me on SSTT (Sat, Sun, Tue, Thu). That way, someone was there everyday just to make sure there was food and that our friend was doing okay.

Last week was busy. I am a stay-at-homeschool dad and there were functions. I had to run to see my parents 200 miles away. I had to do this, I had to do that. The promise I made my friend fell by the wayside. When I arrived in Corpus Christi on Thursday, I felt horrible. I had broken a promise.

I saw my friend in church on Sunday, and he was still thanking me for the food. I apologized that I hadn't dropped by like I promised, but he said I was still there every time every time our friend dropped in.

So, what is a promise?

If you say you are going to do something, do it. Pay the credit card. Visit the friend (in the hospital or elsewhere). Do the work. I used to bite off a lot more than it was humanly possible to do. Someone needed something done, I would be there to do it. Quite often, however, I'd promise to do stuff without checking my calendar. I was notorious for double- or even triple-booking time slots. And when that happens, I wasn't helping the people I wanted to help.

I have become snake-bit to this, and I rarely make promises. I know how hard it is to keep them, and rather than disappoint someone, I'll just not commit. But friendship goes beyond that fear, and I'm learning how to make the commitment to my friends - and stick by it. When I got a mutual friend to visit, I was keeping my promise.

Upon analysis, I find that my promises have become better kept over the years. Partly due to diligence on my part, but mostly due to the influence of the Holy Spirit upon my life. As I go through my life and become more the person God wants me to be, I'll be able to make and keep promises every day. I'm so much better than I was five years ago, and this is not by my action.

Keep your promises. Let your 'Yes' be 'Yes' and your 'No,' 'No'.